World Cancer Day: Five Things You Should Know
By Carly Fleming, M.Ed. RP
Registered Psychotherapist
World Cancer Day is an important opportunity to reflect on how cancer has impacted our own lives, the lives of our loved ones and the lives of people within our community.
As a Psychotherapist who specializes in working with people affected by cancer and an individual whose family has been profoundly affected by cancer, today is a day where I make time to stop and think about all of the people who have bravely shared their stories with me, allowed me to walk beside them for a brief part of their journey, and who have taught me so much about living with grace, courage and vulnerability.
World Cancer Day plays a vital role in raising awareness about cancer throughout the world.
Why is awareness important? The fact is that anyone can be faced with cancer at any time and the more aware we are about the realities of a cancer journey, the more prepared we will be to deal with cancer when it touches our own lives – whether through a personal diagnosis, the diagnosis of a family member or friend, or someone in our community who we come into contact with. There is still stigma attached to cancer and some people react with fear, avoidance, resistance and minimization. These reactions are never helpful and can in fact be incredibly harmful to someone who is dealing with cancer in their life. Worse yet – these reactions can be especially harmful when experienced by an individual who is going through a diagnosis themselves.
In my own small way, I want to help raise awareness by writing this blog and sharing some of my experiences working with people affected by cancer. There are five things I want you to know:
Cancer affects the whole family.
When an individual receives a diagnosis of cancer, there are ripple effects through the whole family. It is so important to remember that the person with cancer is at the centre of a storm of treatment, side-effects, fear, worry, stress, relationship struggles, existential crises, etc. But we also must acknowledge that family members and loved ones are experiencing these things in their own way. The experience of the person with cancer and those close to them are legitimate and need to be acknowledged.
Cancer profoundly affects emotional well-being.
Getting a cancer diagnosis is hard. Receiving treatment for cancer is brutal. Fearing for your life is terrifying. Going through all of this day after day is extremely emotionally draining. Each person will react differently and every reaction is ok. Different people will find different things helpful. For some, positive thinking is really useful whereas for others positive thinking minimizes the difficulties they are experiencing. Each individual with cancer needs to be encouraged to create space for their own emotions and be supported in developing their own coping strategies.
Cancer treatment looks very different for different people.
There are many misconceptions about cancer treatment. Some people are treated with chemotherapy, others are not. Some types of chemotherapy result in hair loss, others do not. Some people have radiation as part of their treatment, others do not. Some people experience terrible side-effects of treatment, others do not. It is so important to remember that just because we know someone (or we are someone) whose cancer journey looked a certain way, this doesn’t mean that the next person with cancer that we meet will have that same experience. Remember to be curious and ask people what their treatment journey looks like. For most people, they will be happy you asked and relieved that someone is showing interest in this very important aspect of their life.
The cancer journey isn’t over once treatment is over.
For the majority of people who experience cancer, the experience stays with them for their entire lives. Some people refer to themselves as a cancer survivor whereas other people don’t like this term. Whatever the label, the impact of cancer is long-lasting. There are emotional impacts that involve fear, struggles with meaning, relationship impacts and many more. The physical impacts can be vast – depending on the type of cancer and treatment received, there are often significant long-term physical impacts. Awareness of these long-lasting impacts are key so our society can make room for and acknowledge the needs of people with cancer throughout their lives.
Most people want to talk about their experiences. But they don’t want to be “boxed in” by your questions or your personal experiences.
This is a tough one because it is so individual. There is no “right” way to talk about cancer or to someone living with cancer. But one thing is for sure – being curious and expressing genuine interest and concern will always be better than making assumptions or qualifying your questions with a long story about your own experience.
How we can help
Everyone needs someone to talk to.
If you are a person who has been affected by cancer and you think you may benefit from some counselling, please get in touch. Regardless of how cancer has affected you and when the diagnosis took place, there is no wrong time to reach out for support. If you would like to know more about whether online counselling at everwell is right for you, book a free 30 minute consultation and we can talk about it. Learn more about Cancer Counselling here.