Navigating the physical and emotional toll of perimenopause and menopause
Perimenopause and menopause are natural stages in a woman’s life, but that doesn’t make them any less daunting. In fact, these transitions often come with a complex combination of physical and emotional challenges that can feel overwhelming. Yet, despite how common these experiences are, many women find themselves navigating these stages with little support, leaving them to battle not only the symptoms but also a sense of invisibility.
The physical struggles: More than just hot flashes
For many women, the first sign of perimenopause is a shift in their menstrual cycle — irregular periods, heavier bleeding, or missed cycles. But the physical effects go much deeper. Hot flashes, night sweats, weight gain, joint pain, and disrupted sleep patterns can all accompany the onset of perimenopause and continue throughout menopause. These symptoms can be debilitating, affecting every part of a woman’s life — from her work to her relationships and self-esteem.
The most talked-about symptom, hot flashes, might seem trivial to some, but for many women, they’re intense, unpredictable, and incredibly disruptive.
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“When a woman goes to her doctor complaining about hot flashes, mood swings, or sleep disturbances, it’s not uncommon to hear that ‘it’s just part of getting older’ or ‘you’ll get over it.’ These reactions only add to the sense of isolation and frustration that women already feel.”
The most talked-about symptom, hot flashes, might seem trivial to some, but for many women, they’re intense, unpredictable, and incredibly disruptive. They’re often accompanied by feelings of anxiety and embarrassment, especially in social or work environments. And night sweats can lead to chronic fatigue, which only compounds the physical exhaustion that many women experience.
Then there’s the shift in hormone levels — especially the decline in estrogen — that can affect everything from skin elasticity to bone density. It’s a time when a woman’s body is fundamentally changing, and not all of these changes come with clear warnings.
Emotional struggles: A mental health toll
As if the physical changes weren’t enough, menopause also takes a heavy toll on a woman’s mental health. Anxiety, mood swings, and irritability are common, and for some, depression can become an all-consuming companion. The sense of identity loss can also be overwhelming. Women often find themselves in a place where their bodies feel foreign, and their sense of self can feel disconnected from what it once was.
This emotional rollercoaster can be exacerbated by the societal expectation that women should “grin and bear it” or worse, simply suffer in silence. For many women, the emotional challenges of perimenopause and menopause aren’t fully understood or acknowledged. This is where the feelings of being dismissed or “gaslit” by medical professionals come into play.
The dismissal and gaslighting by medical professionals
Too often, women’s experiences with perimenopause and menopause are minimized or dismissed by healthcare providers. When a woman goes to her doctor complaining about hot flashes, mood swings, or sleep disturbances, it’s not uncommon to hear that “it’s just part of getting older” or “you’ll get over it.” These reactions only add to the sense of isolation and frustration that women already feel.
Sadly, this lack of empathy and understanding is all too prevalent. Women may be told that their symptoms are “all in their head” or “normal for their age” when in fact, they may be dealing with legitimate, serious symptoms that deserve more than a passing comment. Worse still, some women report feeling that their doctors don’t take their concerns seriously, dismissing their pain and struggles rather than offering solutions.
The dismissal doesn’t end in the doctor’s office. Society often ignores or downplays menopause as something that simply “happens to every woman” without considering how those changes can impact a woman’s overall well-being. This leads to a cultural silence around menopause, leaving many women feeling like they’re alone in their experiences.
Unfortunately, this dismissal is often even more pronounced for women of colour. Studies have shown that women of colour, particularly Black and Latina women, are more likely to be ignored or not taken seriously when seeking care for menopause-related symptoms. These women may experience more severe symptoms but receive less support from healthcare providers, which can contribute to a sense of alienation and frustration. Racial disparities in healthcare, including biases and a lack of culturally competent care, only make the physical and emotional toll of menopause even more difficult to manage.
The lack of resources: Navigating a silent journey
One of the most significant issues women face during perimenopause and menopause is the lack of resources and support. Menopause is still a largely taboo topic, and many women feel they must navigate it on their own. There is a lack of educational resources — books, websites, and community spaces that offer guidance on what to expect and how to cope with these challenges.
Medical resources often feel inadequate as well. Hormone Replacement Therapy (HRT) is not always presented as a viable option, and women may feel pressured to manage their symptoms through trial and error. Other treatments — such as lifestyle changes, exercise, and dietary adjustments — aren’t always readily available or accessible. The lack of clear, consistent advice leads many women to feel as if they’re just left to “figure it out” without the support they need.
Moving forward: Building awareness and support
It’s time we as a society start talking more openly about perimenopause and menopause, and, more importantly, start listening to women who are going through it. Every woman’s experience is different, but the common thread is the need for greater understanding, resources, and support.
Women shouldn’t feel like they’re navigating this journey alone, and they certainly shouldn’t feel dismissed by the very professionals they turn to for help. The conversation needs to shift from minimizing symptoms to acknowledging that perimenopause and menopause are life-altering experiences that require empathy and care.
Medical professionals need to do more to recognize the severity of symptoms and provide resources that can help women manage the transition in a healthy and supported way. In the meantime, it’s important for women to continue advocating for themselves, finding communities, and seeking information. There’s strength in numbers, and when women come together, they can help each other understand what they’re going through and find the support they need. We got this!
If you are looking for support as you navigate your experience with perimenopause and menopause, we are here to help you! Connect with us for a free consultation. You don’t have to do this alone!